What's going through my head right now #2

FREEDOM

Well, Angela Merkel has written a whole big book about this word. You won't get that from me here. Rather a few personal thoughts and approaches to a term that comes across as inflationary and yet as elementary as hardly any other expression in this day and age. Perhaps ‘LOVE’ can still keep up with it.

According to research, freedom appears in four different versions:

individual / personal

political

outwardly

free from need

And things are already starting to get complicated. Everything seems relative, subjective, or is narrowed down and constantly reinterpreted from the perspective of different societies, along with their norms, rules, moral concepts and ethics.

What concerns me is the question of artistic freedom, or what happens when I want to express myself artistically. How free am I? What can I do, what am I allowed to do? Where are the limits? Am I outlawed? Can I do whatever I want? Or do I set limits for myself? Do I draw a line where others would possibly go much further, have no scruples, dare to shape things, expose myself and accept offending and provoking others?

In my opinion, freedom is always relative. I grew up in a very free environment. Of course there were rules in our family, most of which were set by my parents. Then there was school, with teachers who gave us different options. There have always been rules in sport. Rules of the game. Guidelines. And yet I felt that there was room for manoeuvre here, opportunities to discover and contribute myself. These were all essential experiences. Realisations from which I derived my personal interpretation of freedom. Then came dance, and later writing, and my creativity was allowed to unfold. With all its ups and downs.

What inspires me, what inhibits me? Where do I feel a blockade, rigid and insurmountable? Where does it open up new perspectives and approaches for me to move forward, to develop, to take paths that I didn't expect, that fuel my curiosity and trigger a journey of discovery?

I have made a lot of decisions in my life and have usually been allowed to make them myself. And even when others have ruled over me and presented me with a fait accompli, in hindsight I think that was usually a good thing because it freed me from many a burden that I would have found difficult to let go of myself. Be it due to a lack of suffering, existential fear or responsibility for others.

In my current situation, it feels really good to be able to focus solely on myself and my immediate surroundings. Less responsibility for others. More time and energy for myself, my husband and my family. Time to write, to formulate thoughts about dance, with enough distance and yet right in the centre of things.

When I am being creative, moving in the dance studio, on stage I know that I always want to and will ultimately enter into a dialogue (unless it remains hidden in my quiet little room). It then becomes a dialogue with viewers, spectators, readers, a critical audience. As soon as I enter this space and engage with all these people, it is about sending and receiving, about interpretations, empty spaces, points of contact and expectations.

Of course, I move in a relatively free space there. And yet I know that there are laws and that every dialogue is unique. Be it from the individual point of view of each spectator or based on my personal perception of each individual performance.

I have to take responsibility for my own freedom, realise what I am asking for and be prepared to concede and give this to others. This is about lifestyle, content, visions and dreams.

The very fact that I am allowed to reflect on and discover everything about myself helps me to develop further. I am allowed to determine this path myself - be it personally, privately or in my job. This is precisely the freedom that I will continue to stand up for, that I will protect and that I will not allow to be taken away from me.

With this in mind, I wish you all a free and relaxed weekend.

Your Jochen, sincerely